Twin Lakes drained (FAKE NEWS)

Taking a page from national politics, the Bolder County Bored of County Commissioners (BOCC) has approved a Parks and Open Space (POS) Department suggestion to “drain the swamp.” The move comes on the heels of the Planning Commission’s (PC) rejection of a proposal to change the Bolder County Comprehensive Plan (BCCP) in a way that would have allowed higher density housing in the area.

When the memo, obtained by the Twin Lakes Owl Group (TLOG) through an open records request, first was discovered, it appeared that the “drain the swamp” phrase suggested that the BOCC fire the PC members who didn’t know the meaning of PC, and who had apparently forgotten who appointed them.

But upon closer inspection, the memo actually referenced a plan to permanently drain all of the water out of the Twin Lakes to create a much larger parcel of buildable land where the Bolder County Housing Authority (BCHA) could build affordable houses (AH).

The 14-acre lake site is connected to a 3-acre site, and the 3-acre site is connected to an 8-acre site, and the 8-acre site is connected to a 2-acre site, all belonging to Bolder County (BC) and managed by the POS.

“The really good news is that all of these properties border the 8-acre site now owned by the BCHA,” POS ranger Lawrence Berra said. “When you add it all up, we would have 35 acres, and the city of Bolder has another 21 acres on the north side, plus another 3-acre site, so that would give us, let’s say, 60 acres to work with.”

By “us” Berra was apparently referring to the City of Bolder (COB) as well as Bolder County (BC) and the Bolder County Housing Authority (BCHA), and maybe even the Bolder Valley School District (BVSD), which owns another 10 acres next to the BCHA property.

Berra said, “You can look it up. By transferring development rights (TDRs) around, we can actually build all of the houses we wanted to build in the first place, and we don’t have to get four bodies’ permission.”

“Besides,” Berra said, “it’s so crowded nobody goes there anymore.”

TLOG member Christian Bornagin was outraged. “What about the owls?” he said. “Where are they going to find fish to feed on? They’ll have to eat prairie dogs, and without prairie dogs, Bolder County just won’t be the same, and furthermore,