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New roundabout at Highway B-52 sparks conflict

Series: April Fools | Story 10

The State Transportation Department announced that a new roundabout will soon be in operation at the intersection of Highway B-52 and County Line Road east of Niwot. The traffic control device will include reduced speed signs posted for traffic approaching the intersection from both the Weld County and Boulder County side, directing traffic to slow to 35 miles per hour.

The announcement met with mixed reactions from local government officials. Boulder County Commissioners hailed the move as an important part of efforts to curtail accidents at the busy intersection, but indicated the state mandate did not go far enough. "Roundabout - Yes," Commissioner‌ ‌Elias‌ ‌Smith-Jones‌ ‌said.‌ "I've seen all good people turn their heads each day so satisfied, I'm on my way. The roundabout will slow traffic, but the speed limit should be further reduced. To Weld County, I would say, 'Your move.'"

Weld County Commissioners, on the other hand, issued a statement that drivers approaching the intersection from the east would not be cited for violating the safety measures. "We trust that drivers from Weld County will make good decisions when they approach the roundabout, but we've made it clear to our sheriff's deputies that we won't enforce the new restrictions, which violate our residents' constitutional rights to have the freedom to come and go as they please."

Niwot Mayor Bryan "Buggs" Bunnet was furious that Weld County would not enforce the safety regulations. "When it comes to accidents at that intersection, we've made it clear that injured persons brought to our hospital who entered the intersection from Boulder County will be treated first," Bunnet said. "We're not going to put off caring for our citizens if Weld County isn't going to enforce the safety regulations."

Meanwhile, personal injury lawyers were rushing to place advertisements on the menus of The Love Shack, a new fast-food restaurant being built on the Weld County side of the Highway B-52 roundabout. The restaurant, to be housed in a converted WWII bomber, will feature rock lobster and other seafood items.

"This is really good stuff," Law Cougar attorney Cap Danlis said. "We're not going to strong-arm people, but accidents are bound to happen here at Highway B-52, and, with my trusted paralegal Mo-dean, we'll be ready to roam."

 

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