Letter to the Editor

Dear Left Hand Valley Courier,

Mental health has become a much more prominent topic in recent years. There are more articles, news segments, self-help books, and overall discussion of mental health in the general media. All of which is great that our society is on the road to issues around mental health, but the discussion and action shouldn’t end there. Nor should mental health awareness only take place during May - it is ever present and can be an especially difficult thing to deal with.

I am not a medical professional, but I have had my shared experience dealing with mental health struggles personally, and being there for many of those close to me who sometimes struggle as well. I’ve learned a few things that I’d like to share in terms of how to approach the topic and how to best be supportive for those close to you.

It’s hard to know when it’s appropriate to approach someone with anxiety and/or depression. Or even what to say when you do. So what is the right time and what do you say to someone close to you who is struggling?

It’s important to never make assumptions with what someone is going through. It’s also important to never force yourself into the conversation. What is helpful for someone who is struggling is to just let them know they are supported.

Everyone is different with how they deal with their mental health as well as with what they need to feel supported from others. Anxiety and depression can be invisible a lot of the time. “Hey, I was thinking about you and wanted to see how you’re doing. Like really how are you doing?” Let people know you genuinely want to be a part of their support structure and are willing to be a pillar for them. However, don’t overstep and don’t reach out if you aren’t prepared to be supportive. Also be prepared that someone might not be comfortable sharing what’s going on, but it has nothing to do with you; they might just not be ready to discuss yet.

Support can look different for everyone. Some individuals might need someone to just listen with an open ear. Others might want a distraction of some sort to keep their mind busy. Sometimes a person might want your advice (but be sure to let them ask for it; don’t offer your input unsolicited). Or this person might just want some space, and that’s fine too!

Just know it’s nothing against you, they might just need some time to process or don’t want to overbear themselves because they already have support. Even if you reach out to say, “What can I do to best support you?,” know that they might not have an answer. Offer them the options above.

It is also very important to know that someone with a mental health issue, or any “disability” (for a lack of a better term) is not defined by their struggle. Someone with a disability is exactly that, “someone with a disability” and not “a disabled person.” Someone with a mental health issue is “someone with a mental health issue” and not “a mentally unhealthy person.” There’s more to an individual than their struggle, discuss it as such.

While there are many underlying roots for the increase of mental health struggles currently, any resolution is far away. And while going outside, getting exercise, spending time with friends, and working with a mental healthcare professional are helpful and highly encouraged, they can often feel like treatments and not a cure. Be patient with individuals, offer your support, but do not force anyone into a position they are uncomfortable with.

If you or someone you love is struggling with mental health, be willing to have an open discussion or seek help by calling 988 or research local, professional help near you. Again, I am not a medical or mental healthcare professional, but we all need to work together to destigmatize and take genuine action to work with those close to you. It’s ok to not be ok.

Remember, everyone is different in how they show (or don’t show) what they are going through and what they need to be supported. Mental health is a spectrum, not just black and white. What works for one person might not work for another and it is only the person experiencing anxiety, depression, or other mental health issues to say what they need.

Left Hand Valley Courier Reader

Editor’s Note: The Courier’s policy is to publish signed Letters to the Editor concerning matters of local interest, not to exceed 300 words—but we make exceptions. The author of this letter is known to us, and asked that it be published anonymously. Given the nature of the topic, the time of year when mental health issues are most prevalent, the author’s personal experience, and the stigma often associated with mental health issues, the Courier has decided to publish the letter as submitted, and to honor the author’s request.