Let's Talk About...Hey, Mr. Smith

Ok. Call me old school, but when I get a text from someone I barely know that starts with "Hey," I assume it is spam. Who says just, "Hey?"

Apparently, everyone.

The manner in which we communicate has changed in my lifetime.

We used to start a letter with "Dear Mr. Smith." Now, we start a text with "Hey." What happened there?

Does anyone born after 1970 even remember what a letter is today? Letter writing is a lost art with which our children are unfamiliar.

To review, a letter is where you put a pen to paper, fold it, put it in an envelope, lick the edge, seal it, attach a stamp, and drop it in the mailbox. And then wait five days for it to be received. It is really much more than that, though.

A letter is the more formal progenitor of texts, emails and even phone calls.

My sister recently found a letter my grandfather wrote to his son in 1954. The letter was written in that beautiful ancient skill known as cursive handwriting, lasting seven pages. It was funny, descriptive, bawdy, and a bit long-winded. What a piece of art!

Granddaddy wrote from Pennsylvania to my Uncle Bob in Texas, "Have I ever treated you to a choice T-bone steak cut from a Texas steer, fattened on the choice feeds of Pennsylvania, and served in that ancient, that fabulous, that quaint and charming tavern in your own little old town?"

A lost art for sure.

Today, letter writing is done only by those who know what a styptic pencil is.

I still look for letters in my mailbox every day though. Like I am at summer camp. Like a puppy waiting to be fed.

But we now have that instant means of communication at our fingertips - texting.

The goal in texting is to be as succinct as possible, use numbers when you can and no punctuation. And let's not forget those ubiquitous emojis. Emojis are used to clarify whether you mean "It's raining 😭" or "It's raining 😀." Whether you are feeling kind of sick 🤒 or really sick 🤢? Or maybe you just feel like a cat 😹.

So, I ask you, which text would you rather receive?

"Yo WBU 2morrow? I'm down 4 whatever HBU," or, "I am looking forward to seeing you tomorrow. I hope you can still meet us. What would you like to do? I am game for anything. Mostly, I would just like to spend some time together."

Clearly, many texters prefer the former because it is short. Do you know there is an often-used text abbreviation "TLDR?" I am sure you know this, but "TLDR" means "Too long, didn't read." It is hard to imagine a response that is ruder than that. The antithesis of a long newsy letter.

Let me ask you this. Would you rather read "U LOML" or "You are the love of my life?"

One certainly packs a bigger punch.

How about, "Wyd rn? I'll brb, omw 2 ur bff"

Text me what you think that means.

To go one step further, would you rather receive that LOML sentiment in a text, phone call, email or a letter? I vote letter. Why? Taking the time to sit down and write something longhand shows a certain commitment, intensity, and intention. There is a certain power of the written word.

Here's the thing, the medium of communication we choose to use is a communication in itself. For example, a text tends to be the most direct, the most urgent. It is also the most familiar and most casual. And most importantly, it is the most misinterpreted.

Next comes email, followed by the least misinterpreted means of communication, the phone call. You can hear the intonation, nuance, and pauses of the person at the other end of that long wire. Yet we rarely pick up the phone except to maybe call our grandmothers.

Choose your medium and your words carefully. Communication starts when you pick up your phone, computer or pen. So, hey, give it some thought.

I remain very truly your humble servant.